


Human Qualities

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-02
Updated: 2013-01-02
Packaged: 2017-11-23 10:11:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/620976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"So you're not alone," Dean continued as if Benny never said a word. "I don't want you to be alone."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Human Qualities

**Author's Note:**

> Written for asthepiecesfall for the deanbenny secret santa on Tumblr. Prompt: and i think i'm gonna stick around / for a while so you're not alone.

Dean wasn't thinking, and Sam would've said that was typical if Dean hadn't rushed out of the hotel and into the Impala's driver seat, hightailing his way out of there as quickly as he could. He had no specific destination in mind, but as adrenaline flowed and his anger twisted into a dull frustration, Dean realized the only person he could go to was Benny.

Besides, Benny was the source of the conflict with his little brother anyway.

Ever since Martin muttered Benny's name and suggested that he was the one piling bodies all around Carencro, Sam had been shooting Dean glares that were saying one thing and one thing only: I was right. That wasn't something Dean would ever believe, let alone consider, but Sam and Martin were both determined, and now Martin was dead and Sam was pissed and Dean had to get away.

Dean considered calling Benny, but Carencro was only so big and Dean would make it to his boat before he finished explaining the situation to him over the phone. Dean knew Benny would be at his boat; Benny may be a vampire on the run, but he was more of the wait-it-out type than to just pick up and flee. He probably knew Dean could hold Sam off, felt safe enough to stay hidden at the dock for a while. Benny probably shouldn't, but part of Dean was glad.

Dean's frustration didn't subside as much as he would have liked when he finally arrived at the dock, spotting Benny's boat easily. He had been there many times, knew the boat like he knew the Impala and the musty motels across the country; it was just another familiar, common, domestic place, one of the few in Dean's life. But it was still exciting and new and Dean's stomach knotted the slightest bit as he stepped out of the car and made his way to the edge of the dock.

He started to regret not calling, wondering if maybe he had Benny all wrong and he would be on the other side of the state by then, who knew, but Dean could see dim light gleaming from one of the boat's windows and breathed a quiet sigh, relieved that he didn't drive all the way for nothing.

The door opened, surprising Dean, and he was greeted by Benny, looking confused at first until he realized it was Dean Winchester standing in front of him, and confusion melted into worry. Dean suddenly felt sheepish; he didn't want Benny to fret, but Dean's expression must have been extremely readable because Benny simply stepped forward, took hold of Dean's arm and lead him inside.

"Thought it was you," Benny said as he shut the door and Dean headed toward a chair on the other side of the room; he just needed to sit down, the weight of the fight with Sam suddenly pushing him down. "Could hear that car from miles away."

Dean just smirked, a sad one, and Benny sat down on the chair beside him. All of the anger and frustration, doubt and sadness, and worry and anxiety began to wash away. The smell of the boat, the atmosphere, Benny being so close, it just reminded Dean why he wanted to be there in the first place. It was the most at home he had felt in a long time. Nothing had been the same ever since he came back from Purgatory and his relationship with Sam frayed. This was what Dean needed.

"Wanna talk about it?" Benny asked nonchalantly, breaking the comfortable silence, but Dean knew Benny was itching for Dean to speak, to confess everything, because Benny was a listener and a helper and he needed Dean to tell him.

Dean, on the other hand, felt differently. "Not really," Dean admitted. He laughed softly, feeling uncomfortable with the situation when he wished he didn't.

Benny just nodded; Dean could see him out of the corner of his eye as he stared ahead at nothing in particular. Dean tossed his hand up in the air a little, exasperated even though he hardly spoke. "It's Sam."

"I had sorta figured that," Benny said, chuckling softly. Dean just sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.

"You shouldn't be here," Dean said, changing the subject. "You really shouldn't." He turned his head to face Benny, who had been watching him the whole time. His expression wasn't radiating pity, which didn't surprise Dean. There was never any judgment from Benny.

"Why?" Benny asked as he extended his hand toward Dean's and grasped it firmly. Benny's hands were rough and calloused, but his touch was never unwanted. "Martin's dead and I figured I could trust you holdin' back your brother."

"Sam is more than capable to trick me, to go behind me and find a way to-"

"And I'm more than capable to protect myself," Benny interrupted, no annoyance in his tone, just reassurance; reassurance to Dean more than himself, and that made Dean feel silly. Then again, it did ease Dean a tad to hear Benny's southern, quiet drawl mutter it for what seemed like the millionth time, but Dean wouldn't admit that. He simply looked away.

They sat in silence, but once again, it was not awkward or uncomfortable. Hand-in-hand, the boat swayed a little from the waves; Dean had adapted gradually to the sea and started to hardly notice the currents, but Dean liked noticing. He liked remembering where he was and who he was with, that what he was doing and what he was feeling was real.

Dean looked to Benny again, who was gazing at him like Dean was the most important person in the universe, and Dean suddenly realized he was to Benny. He had lost Andrea, his relationship with Elizabeth would never be the same, but Dean was there, always there, and he realized he didn't want to be anywhere else.

Dean tugged at Benny's hand slightly, which prompted a grin out of the vampire. Dean's palm felt sweaty and hot compared to Benny's cold and clammy one. It was a subtle reminder that Benny wasn't human, that Dean was with a creature he should be hunting not leaning forward to kiss. 

But when their lips met, Dean shut those thoughts away into a back corner of his mind, along with fights with Sam and issues with Cas and memories of Hell, and moaned into Benny's mouth, reminding himself that the scrape of Benny's beard against his jaw, the lazy movement of tongues and the unspoken level of passion and love were the only things of importance.

Dean broke the kiss, needing a shallow inhalation before murmuring, "I want to stay with you."

Benny rested his forehead on Dean's, the coldness of it eliciting a shiver down Dean's spine. "No, you don't."

"So you're not alone," Dean continued as if Benny never said a word. "I don't want you to be alone."

Benny pulled back so he could see all of Dean's face, every inch. Every freckle and eyelash and flush of skin. He attempted to find doubt in Dean's expression, but there wasn't even a hint. "You sure we're talkin' about me here, Dean?"

He awaited a rolling of the eyes, a smart remark, or an immediate denial, but Dean simply looked down and shrugged slightly. "I guess I'm speaking for both of us."

There was a pause, and Dean felt tension all through his body and he knew Benny could feel it too. Being so completely honest with Benny was liberating but also terrifying; over the course of the year in Purgatory to this moment, Dean never hid a thing from Benny because he never felt a need to. But confessing his desire to be with Benny, to run away from everything, to stay with him because the loneliness and alienation was eating him alive, was a whole other level of honesty and Dean didn't know if it was right or wrong.

"If that's what you want," Benny almost whispered as he graced his lips to Dean's neck. "I'm not gonna deny you."

Dean's eyes fluttered closed at the sensation of Benny's lips and breath ghosting along his throat. "It's your boat. You could say no."

Benny chuckled before placing a chilled kiss to Dean's collarbone and leaned up to face him again. "Say no to you? Are you kidding?"

That evoked the first genuine laugh from Dean that evening and Benny couldn’t help but join in. Dean kissed Benny again; unable to refrain when Benny was being his only friend, his lover, his life saver. 

Dean spent his entire life hunting things that go bump in the night, never thinking twice before killing any kind of monster, so Dean’s strong feelings for Benny confused him from day one. That was until he realized Benny wasn’t a monster, not even close to one. Benny wasn’t human, but he had human qualities; his kindness, loyalty, and selflessness were enough for Dean and always would be.

Dean would go back to Sam, he always would, and their relationship would heal itself one way or another. Dean would one day think of Cas again without feeling guilt, and Dean would eventually have to part ways with Benny, at least for a while, because either Sam or Cas would need him, and Dean would never turn either of them away.

But at that moment, with Benny lifting Dean up off the chair and Dean wrapping his legs around Benny’s waist as he was carried to the bed in the back room, Dean knew what he wanted. He wanted the waves, and kisses that didn’t have to be chaste anymore, and the weight of regret to wash away with every touch of skin, and he wanted it every second, every day. It sounded simple and easy, but for Dean, it was confusing and foreign and unfamiliar, but Dean could adapt.

Dean fell into bed and Benny joined him, and he felt safe and secure in the waves and in Benny’s arms. It was the start of a new life, a kind of happiness and normality that Dean never truly had.

When clothes were shed and a hot body was pressed against a cold one, Dean swore he heard a muffled ‘I love you,’ and didn’t know if it was he or Benny who breathed it, but it didn’t matter in the end.


End file.
